Tag Archives: life lessons

Top Posts Of 2018 #2

This is the second most-read post written in 2018. I wrote it following the passing of my uncle, the husband of my only aunt and my godmother. The post is about being willing to be surprised and to be wrong. What I found out about him changed a view I had held for many years. Since then, I’ve reminded myself constantly that what you think you know today might be completely wrong tomorrow and I try to behave accordingly as I run my business and consult with clients. Enjoy!

My uncle passed away last week. He was married to my mother’s sister and, obviously, wasn’t a young man. Still, a loved one’s death is never easy and due to a lengthy illness, this one was especially hard. I flew to Florida to attend his funeral and to offer love and support to my aunt and cousins. If you’ve ever sat with folks who’ve experienced a loss, maybe you’ve had a similar experience to what went on. There was much talking and reminiscing about my uncle and many old family memories were shared with a mixture of laughter and sadness.

My uncle was a man I’d known my entire life and yet during the time spent chatting I learned something I’d never known. There was a book on my aunt’s table. In it were poems that my uncle had written over the years, mostly to her. It turned out he had also written a play. I was very surprised by this since my uncle was a rather vocal prognosticator on whatever topic happened to be at hand. Sports, in particular, was something about which he was never at a loss for an opinion. He was in an odd way a less knowledgeable Howard Cosell and although he was frequently wrong he was never deterred from speaking his mind. The fact that he had written love poetry to his wife was not exactly something that I thought he’d be doing.

The point of this is to remind each of us that no matter how well we think we know a topic or a person we need to keep an open mind and a readiness to be surprised. If someone had told me that my uncle was a playwright I’d have thought they were joking. That fact that I saw his poetry reminded me how little I really knew or understood about him.

Be willing to be wrong. Accept that there are things you don’t know and seek them out. Get as many facts as you can. Oddly, my uncle would often opine without having some key facts at hand. Even so, it’s his last message to me as expressed through the existence of his poetry that was probably the best thing he ever said to me. Does it resonate with you too?

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A Few Thoughts From My New Gig

As I mentioned in this space a few weeks back, I’ve begun a new line of consulting involving matching people who are looking to take charge of their business lives and invest in a franchise of some sort with the right franchise for them. So far it’s been interesting work and today I’d like to share a few things I’ve found in this work that I think are applicable to other businesses. By the way, if you’re one of those people who want to be a corporation of one, click here to check out how I can help (end of gratuitous self-promotion).

Many of the things that come up are points that apply when you’re hiring or interviewing for a position yourself. The first is that of shared beliefs. Nearly every franchise gives me a listing of what their ideal candidate looks like. In many cases, they’re not looking at a technical skill set. You can be taught how to refinish a countertop or to run an afterschool program. Instead, I see things such as “belief in helping a community of learners” or “possess a passion to own a senior-focused care company that largely stems from personal experience caring for others.” You can’t teach those things. When you’re hiring, ask yourself if you’re more interested in someone who knows Excel inside and out or someone who will be a supportive member of your team and play nicely with the other kids in the sandbox. I always opt for the latter since I can teach the former.

Another thing that comes up a lot is that of a franchise’s record of success. How well does their system work? What are the financial results that prove it? If you’re looking to take a job because it’s more money, you’re overlooking the fact that the company may be hiring because people are leaving a sinking ship. How long have the current employees been there? Have they come up through the ranks? Why have people left? It’s relatively simple to find out how a company is doing, both from a financial and an employee-relations perspective. Take the time to find out. A larger paycheck is of lesser value if you’re miserable every day.

Finally, I try to help the candidate set realistic expectations about what their prospective business will be about. Very few people like surprises in business. Don’t oversell the job or the company if you’re hiring. Hopefully, you have a great story to tell and you should let the facts and track record speak for themselves. Keep the promises you make. If your expectations don’t align with the company’s or the candidate’s, there’s going to be a massive problem.

I always remind candidates that franchises are awarded, not sold. It’s a mutual job interview, not a business for sale off a shelf to anyone with the resources to invest. Your staff and your career should be treated the same way, don’t you think?

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Filed under Consulting, Helpful Hints, Thinking Aloud

Put It Away!

It’s Foodie Friday and today’s topic is an article I came across about something a restaurant chain is doing that I think is a fantastic idea. I’ll admit that I’m an old-school kind of a guy. When I go out to eat with family, friends, or business associates, I like to interact with them. You know: eye contact, conversation, a few laughs, that sort of thing.

That was the norm until about a dozen years ago when suddenly, everyone got smartphones. All of a sudden the table looked like the reading room at a library. Not a lot of talk and everyone with their heads down reading their phones. I hate it, especially since I generally keep my phone off the table and in a pocket when I’m drinking or dining with others. I figure if it’s an emergency, someone will call me. Responding to an email can wait a few minutes while I finish my meal and my conversation. And trust me – the intense argument on Facebook isn’t worth your time or attention.

What this restaurant chain is doing is simple and smart:

The lack of communication among its diners has prompted British restaurant chain Frankie & Benny’s to offer free meals for kids if families give up their phones when they enter the restaurant. The Italian-American restaurant…came up with the idea after examining the results of a survey it conducted about the way adults use their smartphones. After questioning 1,500 parents and children, the results revealed that around 10 percent of kids had at some point hidden their mom or dad’s handset in a bid to get their full attention. More than 70 percent of the children surveyed said they wished their parents would spend less time fiddling about on their phone, while about the same figure said it felt as if their parents preferred to be on their phone than with them.

Sad that it’s come to that but I often feel just like one of those kids. There is a broader point to be made as well. Walk into most meetings these days and one or more of the “participants” isn’t really participating because they’re preoccupied with their phone. Frankly, I’m a fan of turning phones to silent during a meeting and keeping them out of sight. If what’s going on in the room isn’t more important than what’s happening on your phone then either the meeting never should have happened or you shouldn’t be there.

I guess I have a love/hate relationship with my smartphone. I love that almost all the world’s information is right there and that I can communicate no matter where I am (I still remember running around NYC trying to find a working pay phone during a business emergency). I hate the fact that we respond like Pavlov’s dog to a beep or a buzz. I despise that we’re far less connected during our interactions even as we have the ability to be constantly connected. I didn’t like the fact that as the host I had to ask all the kids to put their phones away while the family was eating, at least for 10 or 15 minutes. You would have thought I had asked them to eat turnips.

Try putting down the phone in social situations and see if the quality of those situations doesn’t improve. Try it in meetings too. What do you have to lose?

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