Category Archives: Helpful Hints

Problems With You People

This will be the last post of this annus horribilis. Beginning next week, I’ll be posting the most-read posts of this year. I’m writing this Christmas Eve, the morning after Festivus. If you’re unfamiliar with this holiday, you can read up on it here or, even better, watch the video below.



So it’s in the spirit of Festivus that I say I got a lotta problems with you people, and now you’re going to hear about it! That’s right – I’m ending the year with a little self-indulgence but I hope some of it rings true.

First, what kind of idiot conflates science with politics? I refer, of course, to those folks who deem wearing a mask or staying at home a violation of their fundamental freedoms. Here’s the problem. Your freedoms end where mine begin (and vice versa). You have no right to infect me, even unknowingly. I’ve written many times here that each of us should know our limitations, and unless you have an advanced degree in virology or epidemiology, maybe you ought to be listening to those who do when it comes to dealing with the horrible pandemic. Rather than violating temporary bans that officials place on bars, restaurants, assembly, etc., maybe you ought to look at how other countries have been dealing with the same issues and what their results have been. I think you’ll see that there are solutions that have kept the citizenry and many businesses quite safe while reducing the incidence of infection and death.

While we’re on the topic, some of you have got to quit believing everything you read on the Internet. Here is an article published in Forbes (a reputable source) that discusses how to identify a reputable source of information along with a list of sources you can check. Get your news from these places and you’ll be less likely to fall for “fake news.” More importantly, you won’t do your friends and others a disservice by spreading lies. You don’t like being lied to, do you? Neither does anyone else.

When I traveled with my eldest child in Italy many years ago, one thing she took away from our nightly dinners was that life is too short for sh$tty wine. What that really means is to treat yourself well. Don’t be so hard on yourselves. I realize that not everyone can afford everything they’d like to have but spending a bit more or fewer things or even just granting yourself an hour to do nothing. The problem I have is that as an older person now I realize I should have taken more time to smell the flowers. Maybe the pandemic has given you that insight was well since we’ve all got a bit more time without commutes, business trips, etc.

My final grievance is this: we need to be nicer. The pandemic has brought out the worst in many of us. Just be nice, as the T-shirt from one of the barbecue joints I frequent reads. Wearing your damn mask is being nice. Not wearing it is being disrespectful to the rest of us (you don’t want to kill someone’s grandma, do you?). Getting the vaccine when it’s your turn is being nice (funny how many folks who denied the virus was really a problem are rushing to the front of the line, right?). One silver lining of this hellish year has been that it demonstrates how we really are all in this life together and how many of the people we depend on might not have been on our radar before. Don’t forget that when this year and this virus are behind us. 

Happy New Year. See you in ’21!

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Filed under Helpful Hints, Reality checks

Fritters

Let’s think about fritters this Foodie Friday. If you’re an American, fritters are usually apple or corn. The former type is sold in donut shops while the latter might be on a menu as an appetizer or side dish. Occasionally you find other types of fritters. Conch comes to mind as do other sea creatures as being sometimes seen in the fritter manifestation.

Of course, that raises the question of what exactly IS a fritter? Is it a puffy, round doughnut-like thing covered in icing and filled with apple? Is it a ping-pong ball-sized lump of batter? Technically, it’s any form of battered meat, seafood, vegetable, or fruit which is then fried. There are sweet fritters and there are savory fritters, and that definition opens up a lot of other foods to fall into the fritter category. Tempura is a fritter. They serve fritters of peas or pineapple or potato with fish and chips in England. Were the potato latkes folks had for Hanukah fritters? They might be, actually.

Why do I bring this up? Because depending on where you are in the world, a fritter can be very different. It raises the issue of YOU knowing what you mean when you say something but your listener just might not be understanding your words in the way you intend. I think we’ve all had the experience of telling a friend or family member or coworker something only to later find that he or she completely misunderstood you—or never heard you at all. There are a lot of reasons why this happens and one of them is that the meaning of any of the words is unclear.

We’ve all played “telephone”, the game where one person says a longish (12+words) sentence to someone who then repeats it to the next person and so on. How often does the original sentence come back intact? Rarely, in my experience, and the likelihood decreases when we use words like fritter that can have many meanings (and that’s just in its noun form!).

What you think you are saying may mean something quite different to someone else—particularly if you start in the middle of a thought, choose a wrong word or speak too quickly. You might order an apple fritter expecting something you’d get in a donut shop and end up with a dough ball that looks like a hushpuppy containing some apple. Remember that we don’t speak to hear ourselves talk (at least I hope not). We speak to communicate with others and making sure that they understand what we’re saying is just as important as what it is we’re saying. Otherwise, we’re just frittering our ability to communicate away. You with me?

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Filed under food, Helpful Hints

Dug In

One thing that I’m constantly reminding myself about is being too dug in. Unless you’re preparing for a full assault from an opposing army, being dug in is generally detrimental on a lot of levels. It stops productive discussions which can lead to positive change. It stifles new ideas and “different” thinking. Sometimes, it even works directly to your disadvantage, producing a pyrrhic victory but little else. Let me give you an example.

This one is from the world of politics but ignore that. I use it only because it’s a perfect example of being dug in and how it can work against you in an extreme sense. With me so far? OK.

Kynect is the Kentucky name for Obamacare. During the campaign a year ago for Governor, there was a woman being interviewed who had health problems and her dependent son had serious health issues as well. She told the interviewer that she and her child were able to obtain the healthcare they needed for the first time under the Kynect program. She also said she was voting for the candidate (Bevins) who said he would get rid of Kynect. The interviewer asked if she believed that Bevins would keep his campaign promise and get rid of Kynect. She said that she believed he would. The interviewer asked her why she would vote for someone who she believed would take away the healthcare that she and her son needed. She answered that she had always voted Republican, so she was going to continue to vote Republican.

That’s not a shot at Republicans. I know Democrats who are just as dug in on voting for their party regardless of the candidate’s position on the issues. My point is that you can’t be dug in. It applies to your openness with respect to new ideas. It also applies if you are “stuck” in a job you don’t like, with people (even working virtually) you don’t like. It’s obvious that it’s time for something you DO like and to dig out.

I find those people all the time while helping them explore their way out via franchises. I tell them to keep an open mind and not be dug in. Take time to learn the culture, mission, and vision of the businesses we’re exploring. You want a change, but to reach your goals, it must fit your beliefs. It does you no good to dig out of one situation into one that’s just as bad, or worse.

How dug in are you? Can I help?

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Filed under Franchises, Helpful Hints, Thinking Aloud