Miss Manners

Lots of things have changed over the years since I began my business career. One of the things that has NOT changed for the better is the relaxation of the common courtesies we all call manners. No, I’m not thinking it’s a good idea to return to the age when everyone was Miss Smith and Mr.Jones but I do miss some of the basic principles of manners I was taught, many of which have gone by the wayside, it seems.
First and foremost seems to be the one about being on time. When a meeting is called for 11, I was taught it’s really not OK to show up at 11:10 unless there were visible signs of a trip to a hospital.  What astonishes me is that it’s not always the senior folks, the ones whose schedules or self-importance sort of gives them the “full-professor” time grace.  Junior folks saunter in late just as often.  Amazingly, when visitors would come to my office half an hour late and I’d tell them we only had 30 minutes left to meet, they’d get angry.  And DO NOT get me started on the use of Blackberries in meetings.  Yeesh!

Then there is the dichotomy of  communication being so easy yet simple acknowledgments are impossible.  You send someone a proposal and it takes several emails or calls just to be sure it got through the spam filters and was received.  I certainly don’t expect an immediate “yes” or “no” but I would like to know that you got what I sent, you can open the attachments, you understood what I proposed and you’re considering it.  Too often, it’s the “Black Hole” treatment.

There were lots of other things that were taught as good manners which, frankly, are really just smart things to do.  Smile, look people in the eye, introduce the senior people first and in order of rank to the junior ones.  Those are a few.  I still feel weird about calling someone my senior by their first names until I’m invited to do so but since it seems, these days, I’m usually one of the older ones in the room I guess I won’t have to worry so much.

Common courtesy, manners, etiquette – call it what you want, but don’t forget about it.   You’ll probably never hear anyone call you out on it but believe me it DOES make a difference.

Any major faux pas you’ve seen?  Any pet peeves?